From time to time I like to share my personal thoughts to build intimacy with my readers. Writing is always a wonderful way to give birth to creativity, emotions and unique ideas. Since I was young, I have always been the kind of person that was transparent and sometimes brutally honest. In fact, I got in trouble often with my mom, because I didn't seem to have a filter. Over the years, I've learned the art of communicating ideas in a more tactful and appropriate way. In no way do I believe I have the right to say anything I want to say so I constantly check myself before I speak.
In God's humility, I find it unnessary to always explain myself or defend myself. Many times I'm tested to see if I will be the bigger person in the situation. I do my best to bridle my tongue and resist opportunities to make myself look better than someone else, out do someone else or compete with someone else. A lesson I learned long ago or perhaps for some special reason only beknown to God, I have always inately been self confident. I clearly believe that there is a difference between self confidence and arrogance. Arrogance is based off a false value of oneself. Self confidence is based off an accurate assesment of true value and mostly on what God has said about you!
I constantly strive to be a better me, learn from mistakes and do things differently. When getting to know people, I've learned that what glitters is not always gold. I don't always reach for what is in front me too quickly! I watch, observe, take mental notes, and listen. If I'm interested in something or someone I may ask lots of questions. If I don't ask questions this means I'm not trying to understand. Certainly, I have learned to rid my life of people I can not trust. So when something starts to smell anything like "untrustworthy" you can best be sure it's going to end up in the waste basket. In all of this, it's caused me to be straight forward...getting straight to the point. I will not hesitate to make my expectations known and tell you exactly what I want, so there is no question about my motives and that's in anything. I do my best to hear from God about who and what is suppose to be in my life so I'm not overly dissappointed when people choose to not deal with me. In my circle of accountability, I allow myself and actions to be under scrutiny.
This one thing gets me though. I always want to know why a person has chosen to reject me in whatever way they have. Now I know most of you will say, how could I ever be rejected. This happens to me more often than you think. I'm pretty much persuaded that it's not me with the issue but rather with those doing the rejecting and it is most likely for my good but I still can't help but wonder what "their" reasons were. The key to rejection is to try not to take it too personal. Yet and still...What are they thinking? Do you ever wonder that? Of course, I'm not perfect, none of us are and there are things that I am still personally working on to increase my value. I'm open to correction. I can take the truth as well as I can dish it out. It may hurt at the time but if it's the truth...I want to hear it. But most people do not want to hear the truth. The truth can make you free and if you apply it your value will increase.
Unfortunately, I think the reason why people won't be honest to tell you what they were thinking is because it exposes their own personal weakness. You know what, you don't have to share your weakness with me but my question is this, "Is there anyone in your life that you can and do share your weaknesses with?" So that you can have the right perspective and perhaps overcome your weaknesses. Are you willing to be vulnerable? Are you capable of trusting? Have you ever shared any of your weaknesses? Are you trying to protect your image? Cause for sure the answers to these questions will either enhance or obliterate any change of you having real intimacy!