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Friendship and Social Media

Never apologize for craving a relationship; an emotional connection with others. Of course our priority is to first have a relationship with God. He created us and He created us to crave relationships. He gave us a soul: mind, will and emotions to analyze, choose and feel all the positive things that go along with being in a emotional relationship with others whether male or female. Unfortunately, many of our choices have left us to feel only negative emotions like; anger, disappointment, pain and rejection. Though negative emotions can not always be avoided we can minimize them by becoming healed of old wounds, transforming the way we think and making better decisions.

In our downtime, or when we seem to have fewer relationships than we’d like, this is a wonderful opportunity to mature, develop, seek God and know ourselves. This equips us to make better decisions that will increase our fulfillment and happiness. Never make excuses for who you are or who you are becoming, just be committed to the process of becoming the person you are meant to be. Yes, you’ll leave some relationships behind but you’ll gain some new ones. Yes there will be times when you seem to have very few fulfilling relationships. But allow God to work on you and prepare you for the greatest relationship(s) you may ever experience.

We all long for emotional connections, friendship and perhaps an eternal spiritual, physical and emotional connection with that of the opposite sex. All of my best friends are either in other states or married, so I could definitely use some more friends. Singles need single friends! I sometimes worry about being misunderstood. I worry that when I reach out to others for friendship, it will be misconstrued. Most people don’t understand that friendships are necessary. More dialogue is needed on the subject so that we can better understand others and be on the same page. A mature quality is knowing what you want, and to be able to effectively communicate that to others; without fear of being misunderstood or rejected. If you are honest with yourself about your intentions and you communicate your interest in attempting to establish a friendship with someone, this is commendable. If you’re misunderstood, that’s their problem not yours. More often than necessary, do we feel disappointed, rejected and misunderstood due to a lack of communication. I’ve been rejected by both men and women in seeking friendship.

The key to overcoming rejection is to move on quickly by remembering your trust is in God and He will give you the relationships you need in due season. But certainly don’t beat yourself up for reaching out.

Social media can be a challenging place to make new friends. You have to understand that only desperate people don’t have real lives outside of social media. Social media can be a stage of illusion. Having a real life doesn’t necessarily mean you have as much going on as someone else, but what it does mean is that you - are - valuable (a person of substance i.e. character, honesty, drama free and you’re aggressive and proactive about pursuing your goals and becoming a better you. Remember, there is no way you can know someone based on social media alone. We have to be very careful of “falling” for an image rather than who a person really is. All social media can do is spark an interest. That interest doesn’t have to be sexual either. Depending on where you are in your life, what your needs are at that time and finding someone with similar interest can be your motivation for seeking out friendships.

Do your due diligence. If you are genuinely interested in being friends with someone on social media remember that reading is fundamental. Get to know some facts about that person. It’s not their job to educate you. Remember that friendship is about equality and purpose. Though you may not be equal with them in every way, you should be equal in these key areas: intellectually, spiritually, and emotionally while sharing common interests and goals. The purpose for friendship is to provide support; spiritual, emotional and sometimes financial. To provide companionship, accountability, and encouragement. To challenge you, sharpen you, mature you. Don’t cheat yourself! Remember, friendship is about influencing others this requires mutual respect.

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